On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, we meet with Jacqui Acree, Certified EFT Practitioner. As an EFT practitioner, Jacqui Acree is a self-compassion advocate, goal trauma coach, and a self-help disruptor. She's the founder of Being Human Together, an online course community where she uses EFT to empower highly sensitive women to free themselves from chronic stress, perfectionism, and their inner critic so they can live each day as their favorite version of themselves. We talk about what it’s like to be an Enneagram Eight, finding softness and gentleness through EFT tapping, and the power of NOT powering through.

Welcome back to Enneagram IRL, the weekly podcast where we go beyond Enneagram theory and dive into practical understanding, new clarity, and fresh insight. This week’s bonus episode is about using the Enneagram in therapy as a client. I talk about my experience as a therapy client and a professional coach with the goal of empowering you to use the Enneagram in your own growth work in a way that you believe is best for you.

When discovering your Enneagram type, it’s important to focus on the core motivation of each type rather than focusing on each type’s common behaviors. For some, recognizing their core motivation is immediate. For others, it takes a bit more self-discovery along with, perhaps, some deeper knowledge of the Enneagram. In this post, I highlight 4 things we should keep in mind when we talk about core motivations, as well as an overview of each type’s motivation and what they’re frequently avoiding. You’ll also find journal prompts to help guide you through observing your own core motivation.

On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, we meet with Kimberly Reese, a licensed therapist, expert on Black Agency, and a Certified Enneagram Coach based out of Charlotte, North Carolina. With over a decade of specialized experience in treating trauma in the BIPOC community. She is originally from South Florida but was raised in Durham, North Carolina where she obtained her Bachelor of Social Work from Meredith College and completed her Master of Social Work at The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. She is committed to shifting the culture of mental health services by promoting quality therapeutic services to her clients in North Carolina. We talk about what it’s like to be an Enneagram Three, emotionality and being in the heart center, the Type Three approach to losing, failure, and achievement, and learning to do things we’re bad at.

On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, we meet with Camille Logan, a licensed clinical mental health clinician who co-owns a private practice called the KC Collective in Raleigh, North Carolina. She enjoys working with adolescents, college students, and adults on a range of issues, but primarily around helping people untangle limiting beliefs, undo unhelpful patterns, and heal from hurtful experiences to help build a healthier narrative that makes room for healing, connection, and personal freedom. We discuss how Camille integrates the Enneagram in professional settings as a therapist who acknowledges the Enneagram as a tool of self-discovery, assertiveness, social justice, and the value of connection and vulnerability. We get a clarifying look into the fascinating depths of an Enneagram type Seven.

On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, we meet with Jessica Denise Dickson, a life empowerment coach who believes that when Black women heal, the world heals. She believes that the path to personal and collective healing comes through embodying our Enneagram and liberation work. Jessica supports clients, through groups and one-on-one work, with the reclamation of our full humanity - healing work that leads us to equity, justice, and freedom. We discuss that when we do this work, we live more authentically with self-trust, self-safety, and fully-embodied freedom, and this echoes into our communities and changes the world. We explore Jessica’s beautiful and powerful experience as an Enneagram Eight whose love for life, people, and justice is so evident and quite contagious!

I've teamed up with parent coach, @evita_wellness, for this post. Rebecca is a coach and counselor in British Columbia, Canada, and she’s trained in the Enneagram, Somatic Attachment Therapy, and working with trauma. She also has extensive experience in parent-teen mediation, parent coaching, and she is a parent of 3 herself! All that to say – she knows her stuff AND as an Enneagram 8, she’s going to point YOU back to what you already know in your own experience and development. Rebecca believes in empowering and encouraging parents as they are, which is why she uses the Enneagram in this sphere.

Using the Enneagram in your parenting has less to do with typing your kids and more to do with effective self-management. The goal here isn't to be perfect: the goal is to find self-compassion, growth, and the way forward as an imperfect person raising humans.

On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, we meet with Dr. Shelley Prevost, Co-founder of Big Self School, a personal development studio focused on supporting the mental and emotional well-being of leaders, teams, and organizations. She is a licensed therapist, educational psychologist, leadership coach, and Enneagram practitioner. She has 25 years of clinical and coaching experience combined with 10+ years as an early-stage investor and startup executive to help create workplaces where everyone can thrive. In this episode, she shares fascinating insights into her experience as an Enneagram Two and how she approaches inner work for herself and professionally with others.

When I think about communication, I think about more than just talking: it’s how we express ourselves (even silence is a form of self-expression), it’s how we connect (or don’t), it’s how we build relationships and cultivate our lives. It’s everything! And this is one of THE most important ways I think we can use the Enneagram. How do you communicate with yourself? (Yes, it’s a thing!) And how do you communicate with others?

If you’ve been curious about using the Enneagram for growth, improving your relationships, and deepening self-awareness, I have good news for you!

On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, we meet with Liz Goulding, ADAPT Certified Health and Wellness Coach. Liz focuses on the intersection of personal well-being and professional development, working primarily with creative professionals and self-employed individuals who want more energy and capacity to meet life's challenges and opportunities. We discuss navigating day-to-day life, running a coaching business, and experiencing personal growth as a Self-Preservation Type One. I’m particularly excited about this conversation because, fun fact, Liz is my personal coach! 

Gift-giving just got a little bit easier! With my knowledge of the Enneagram and input from hundreds of individuals in the Nine Types Co. community, I put together some gift guides for every Enneagram Type on your list. Holidays, Birthdays, or Just-because — These guides are suitable for year-round gifting!

Every individual is unique, regardless of their Enneagram type, however, this may be a great place to start your search! So, while some of the gifts on these lists may be exactly what you’re looking for, others may not. And that’s okay! Within each guide, I walk you through conceptual ideas and what that type has expressed they’re most commonly interested in, according to the feedback I’ve received.

Sometimes too much of a good thing can actually create challenges for us. Our strengths are no different. At times, we know when we’re overusing our strengths, but sometimes this tendency is more challenging to recognize. I love to use the Enneagram to identify strengths in myself and others, but we also need to notice when we are overusing them!

While Type One is commonly known as “The Perfectionist”, it’s important to note that their main focus isn’t really about being perfect or being the best. “Being good” is much deeper than that, but it’s hard to find and sustain. In this post, I mention Ones repress their anger, and while most Ones do this to some extent, some Ones (the sx subtype in particular) are more comfortable feeling and expressing anger. Also, Ones often wish others knew that when they correct or advise, they genuinely want to help. They’re not trying to be mean.

One aspect of the Enneagram that I think is often overlooked is how buried a lot of our patterns are. We don’t have these patterns because we can’t see another way - we have them because we’ve needed them to make it through life. Twos are no different! So when we say, “have boundaries” - it’s not like they don’t know that! It’s more like they need to reimagine how one can find a deep, sustaining sense of being loved and worthy while ALSO having boundaries.

Also, if you’re a Two, you don’t have to give all the credit to your wings for the aspects of you that are career-driven. Twos can be very driven and ambitious, too!

Type Threes are sometimes referred to as “The Performer” or “The Achiever.” However, as a Three, I think the thing people overemphasize with this type is the image of success. And I think the image of success matters to Threes as long as we emphasize that it’s not limited to financial or career success: it’s whatever “success” means to that individual and their family of origin or culture.

A lot of Threes have really tough inner critics related to never doing enough and not being 100% efficient. I find that people assume Threes are more confident and self-assured than they typically are. Threes need encouragement, too!

Type Fours are known to be comfortable with feeling a wide range of emotions. However, it's important to note that they’re not perpetual balls of emotion. They can often put those aside to get things done! So, don’t underestimate Fours – they are very capable. Being driven by authenticity is powerful!

There are so many individual differences within Type Four that sometimes it can feel daunting to try to describe them all in one post (especially because Fours often know themselves so well, they’re able to describe themselves in detail). So, if you have a Four in your life, feel free to use this information as a starting block to engage in conversation with them. I find most often, within a safe & patient environment, they welcome the opportunity to explain how they see the world.

There’s so much more I could add to this post but I may have to save that for another time! Type Fives have so much more going on under the surface than they may express. So it’s important not to assume how they feel or what they’re thinking, especially if they may be coming off as “cold” or “uninterested”. For some Fives, this can be really frustrating, even hurtful, coming from those they truly care about. (More on this below!)

Sixes are really hard to capture in a post like this because different types of Sixes can be so incredibly different. I’ve done my best based on the Sixes I’ve worked with and everything I’ve learned and read about Sixes!

While Sixes are known to be natural troubleshooters, often their questions can be viewed as a product of being afraid or anxious. However, this may not always be the case. Their vigilant nature can really help to serve themselves and others in the most helpful ways. And it’s important that we don’t underestimate what Sixes can handle!

Just because Sevens can be enthusiastic and fun-loving, this doesn’t negate their intelligence or their ability to take matters seriously! Whether in their relationships or ambitions, Sevens can be very committed. So don’t underestimate them or think they can’t do something because they just might be up for the challenge to prove you wrong.

Also, because Sevens are often the ones to keep high spirits in most situations, it can be easy to forget that they too need encouragement at times. Even if it’s short and sweet, let the Sevens in your life know how they’re appreciated!

I find that type Eights are very often misunderstood, and they tend to recognize it. Their communication style alone can cause some Eights to feel like they have to dial themselves back for the sake of others’ feelings, which can be frustrating. So it helps to note that while they may not show it, Eights truly are compassionate towards others.

Not only do Eights fiercely protect themselves, but they also tend to fiercely protect others. They can have a knack for using their strength to empower and lift others up. I encourage you to look beyond what may initially seem intimidating.